Starbucks Adds Leonard Cohen To "Saturday Morning Suicide Playlist"

Explained Starbucks PR rep Adam Smitthee, "We just thought we could eliminate some of those depressed people who do nothing on the weekend but stick around and mope--they reduce table space and drive off less morbid customers. We also added The Beatles' Eleanor Rigby, just to rub salt in it." { background-color:blue; }